Author: Liberty

As a married couple, we are now approaching our 39th wedding anniversary next month. My husband is such an exemplary man to others especially to his parents and siblings. Their unlimited wants and never ending favors were all granted never mind if our relationship suffers. He never listen to my problems. He’s very good in leading Bible Study and Sunday School teacher yet when it comes to our family, not his priority. He has a lot of hidden agendas when get caught he denied. He really thinks that all he does is correct in the eyes of the Lord. He shoulders all the responsibility to his parents because no one of his siblings wants to share the responsibility. He’s like a robot following whatever his parents wanted him to do,
It’s like his motto in life is Honor thy Father and honor thy mother. It would be a great sin if we live on our own and make our own decisions. Need your prayers that God will intervene in this situation. Thank you. God Bless You.🙏

I seem to be struggling with relationships in all areas: work; home, neighborhood and friends.

At work, one of my contractor counterparts is the most manipulative, dishonest, unpleasant men I have ever met. I oversight his work and my Christian values and his lack of values are a constant problem. He spreads lies to all his contractor counterparts so they all dislike me and think I am the bad guy. My supervisor thinks I am the problem and because he cannot ding or blame our contractor, so he blames me. Our contract with this contractor has no vehicle to affect their ratings, so my supervisor does not. I cannot do the work, the contractor must, and I find errors with nearly every document he produces. It has been going on for years and has gotten to the point where I have been reprimanded and suspension has been proposed. I appealed to the Senior Director because it is the quality of the work, the fact that this contractor hides critical information from me, and constant drama that the contractor engages in that causes me to react. This contractor is to provide accurate work with no errors and he does not. I consulted with my Pastor who tried to guide me on reacting to this person which has helped. Now, I critique without emotion, but not before this contractor and his supervisor have ganged up on me which caused the reprimand and the suspension. You see, I am seriously affecting their ability to charge the government for more labor hours, plus the Supervisor is afraid I will affect her rating, which affects her award fee.

At home, my neighbor is angry and combative, although I have done nothing but be kind to her. She complains about every tiny little thing I do to the HOA and now they have taken up her complaints to the point that I could receive violations. She did not like the colors of my pots on my patio where I grow vegetables – they did not match; she lied and said I had three grills on my patio – I have one; she complains that I park my truck in my driveway (54 other residents do too, including three HOA Board members); and she does not like my Ring security system, etc. Thankfully, the VP of the HOA has taken pity on me and is helping me fight the Board. If it were not for him, I would have received three violations already. I had the VP come over who found no problem with my patio, my pots now match, although the VP said I did not need to do that, he found no problem with me parking my 2019 truck in my driveway and I have adjusted the Ring security system, to hopefully minimize her concerns.

Friends: I am cutting back my friends to only those who believe in God & Truth. When they lie, embellish or don’t tell the truth, I gently call them on it. But they do not like that and then cut me out of their life, which is fine. I have no interest in people who are not true believers, but that means only have three or four true God-believing friends. I had a Believer girlfriend who tried to get me to go on social media and rail against wearing masks during covid, I refused and our relationship exploded with nasty accusations from both of us. I unfriended her because she started spreading rumors to our other friends who then unfriended me. She just could not live with the fact that she could not control me. I was sad, because she was fun to be with, but too controlling. I chose to wear masks because my immune system was in serious trouble. She chose not to and got Covid, her husband died which was sad, while I have never had it to this day.

Men: I have been single for over 35 years looking for a Godly, kind, loving man and he has been elusive. I would like to find a good man when I move into retirement so we can enjoy life’s adventures. Please pray for that Godly man to materialize.

My sister: My sister and I have always had a rough relationship, although I do not understand why. I was the pretty, popular one and she could barely make friends while we were young. Because she tattled on me constantly, I did not include her in my circle and for that I feel badly. I should have recognized she was trying to get my attention by tattling, but at 15, 16, and 17 I was not aware of that deep sorrow she must have been feeling.
In adulthood, I am the successful one, while she has barely scraped by. She keeps marrying men who are not Believers and they do not treat her well. Although they are successful with great occupations, they do not give her enough money to buy any extras, whether that is clothes; jewelry; good shoes, good boots for winter, winter jackets, vitamins, natural pain supplements for her arthritis, etc. So I buy all these things for her. I buy the correct size, color, brands she approves of, I buy expensive jewelry for her because her husbands (past and present tense) will not. We have recently gotten into bad arguments because her son stole an expensive gun my Father gave to my brother who gave it to me. Her daughter (a felon who has gone to prison twice) recently tried to force me to give her my car under threat of extortion.
Recently, my sister accused me of being controlling. I told her if she thought I was controlling how about we don’t talk unless there is an emergency so she can see who is controlling. Her husband is the controlling one who will not give her enough money to buy the medications and supplements she needs to help her with her medical issues. Without me spending thousands of dollars every year on her, perhaps she will come to appreciate that I was trying to help her out because her husband will not. I send her birthday and Christmas presents, but now I stop there. She has not contacted me for three months which is fine. I think she still is dealing with some kind of childhood jealousy or something because I was the successful one which is really dumb. She has many gifts I do not have which are much more important than being able to financially help someone. She is kind, loving, helps sickly people, dog shelters, gives her hard earned money to police departments and things I should be doing but do not. Because she married an unequally yoked man, she no longer goes to church and has lost site of gratefulness. When my Father died, he asked me to take care of her because she could not stand up for herself, so that is what I have done for the past 15 years, while asking for nothing in return. She sends thank you cards and that has always been enough for me, but it must make her feel small in some way. If she went back to church, she would realize she’s got some issues she needs to deal with and that I have only been trying to help her. Please pray she figures this out. I do pray that she will in time and I will keep sending her birthday and Christmas presents.

Thank you for praying for me and ask the Holy Spirit to guide me to do the right thing in my relationships because clearly, I need His help.