Author: Gerri

Heavenly Father, I come before you asking for
Intervention for my daughter and her relationship. She has gotten off track and broken things off with her boyfriend. This boy is heart broken and completely shattered. She is lost and treating people badly, lying and pushing him away. He is so good for her and being so patient. He is waiting for her to get herself together and it is eating away at him. She says she wants to still be with him, but has to fix herself first, but I cannot tell if she is being honest or not. He has been a part of our family for a long while and it is so hard for everyone. Please pray that these two get resolution and/or reconciliation, according to God’s will. Pray that my daughter finds her way and that her boyfriend is still there when she does, if that is what the Lord has planned. Pray for help for us all to say and do the right things to help in this situation. Amen.

Pray that Matt, Tyler stop harassing me and get help. Matt jokes about being violent, committing suicide and framing me and Tyler gossips, makes up dramatic lies, distracting the whole group away from our work and scapegoating others. I pray they stop hurting our team and everyone learns to mind their business when it comes to me and A. I especially pray that A forgives me for scaring him, connecting with others instead of him, and trying to cut him out. I also pray that he would reject bad influences from Owen who did some actually shady stuff, and others who use him. I pray I forgive A for my pain and jealousy around his connections with X, K, G, etc, and his anger and retaliation to me.

Good Morning Lord Jesus.
I love you Lord, because you fist loved me.
All of my adult children left me when times like now.When I need them the most. I had been left alone after being a SINGLE parent of 4. Back-and-forth to Family Court to file petition for child support. Fighting for visitation rights for the Fathers, because I felt that it was the right way. And I realize that the fathers were never there for me. I struggle alone raising 3 children.I can see myself on the battlefield crying out for help and there was no one there. At that time I didn’t have personal transportation. I rely on public transportation for everything. Such difficult times with three young children. Doctors appointments/ after concerts, choir practice, grocery store/ taking children too in from school/ entertaining purposes were very limited. It was one of the most difficult task, but my God made a Way for me. Two of my children went to the neighborhood school. Doing those times I would buy a twin stroller to stroll the two youngest. While my second elders child and I walk together. I remember the area where we lived. It would always flood during rainy days, Before my son got to school water would be halfway up to his ankles. I remember carrying an umbrella when temperature were so hot? The dad‘s were not paying me child support nor spending time with them .When I had little to feed the children. I will just sit there and watch them as I fill myself up with Ginger-ale. I would always hear my children tell me you could have some of my food, but I would say no mommy‘s OK. As long as you guys are eating, mama be ok i would say. I never felt so lost confuse hurt depressed without anything. But now I see myself alone with no adult children coming around to help me. I feel like if I sacrifice myself people will be happy and I feel that I will be happy as well. Living in this body, I feel so alone I feel lost, heartbroken,confused, hurt, abused, depressed, suicidal, overwhelmed by the pain, what hurts the most is that all of my Adult children betrayed me. They have no shame, showing me that they are helping the females that they are sleeping with/ living and not helping me no shape or form. I can truly say that I always have been a fair mother towards all of my children. I feel that my children should understand that some of their siblings needed more help than the others. I want too thank Lord Jesus that all my Adult children graduated from High School and None of my children had children nor my children had problems with the law. A, B,C students in school.
Oh by the way now my 40-year-old and my 31-year-old we’re having a hard time putting their priorities in order after graduating from High School.
I watched my two sons after graduating from High School. They wanted to be of the world.They didn’t want to work.They both are disrespectful towards me with their words and actions towards this day. One decided he want to go out and sell drugs with a 9 mm bullet tape to his chest. While the other decided he wanted to live in the streets. Drinking/ Drugs and be of the world. If they would all understand how much pain and worrying/stress that I’ve been through with their irrational decisions. My solution at that time for both, were to either use my G.I. Bill to go to college or join the military. Well they both join the U.S.Army. I thank you Lord Jesus for your grace and your mercy that my two sons are now retired from the military. I am lost with words. Why did these two sons of mind turn their
backs-completely against me and allow their mother to see that they are taking care of another woman. This is one of the most difficult and hurting experience that any single mother, or mother could ever experience from their children. I can truly say the love that I have for India, Antonio, Luis, and Raymond has nothing but been true love. And like I stated at the beginning. I am spiritual with no religion attached.So that being said, God command me to do right by everyone. I did my very best with my mother/all of my adult children/homeless people/people that were on drugs. So why am I standing alone on this battlefield. Where no one is there to pick me up to help me with my needs because all of my blessings that I received I shared each and everyone so faithfully so honestly so willing so loving. That it made a person like myself so happy, knowing that people were happy that I could help them. I don’t understand why my children decide they want to be very disrespectful to me disobedient and betrayed me after all the positive model as a single parent for the most. Only God knows that I did not allowed my children to hurt one another. I didn’t allow them to argue With one another. I would have both parties get up in hold each other’s hands and ask for Forgiveness for what they have done to one another. Then they were to hug and kiss one another and say that they love one another. I can truly say that the love I had for my children back, then has change so drastically. The betrayal the lies and disrespectful has brought so much pain in my heart / no trust. Even when there dads were NOT in there lives.I never said anything negative towards any of my children dads. Nothing but positive vibes. I have always been a loving and caring over protected mother. That being said, I always ask my children to Forgive their dads and that they also need too Forgive themselves. What I have noticed is that my kids would frown there faces up at me. When I would tell them to do positive things, and even their body language will be so off. I never understood why they always had an attitude with me if I would tell them to do the positive things because this is what God wants us to do. I have noticed that the time that I have spent with my children , I have tried my best and did my best with God’s commandments. My kids didn’t grow up in a household like I did, and didn’t know God they would always have to read strictures and prayers in the mornings.I am a believer in God, but I didn’t understand. I was in a household with a mother that was a Jehovah witness My father the only time I seen him pray was over our meals. But I can say that I learned from this all is that I never took the time out for myself. I was always willing.Up to this day I still help anyone. Everyone is my sister and brother in Christ, so if I seen anyone I would always try to help I remember. On Veteran Day. I check out what restaurants are giving out free meals. I will go to several restaurants and gather up food to give to the homeless My heart is so big because I have a beautiful Heavenly Father that is in Heaven that is helping me and people like me. I know I sometimes I feel like given it up Because it’s not money that I want it’s just a family and love and gatherings.I need prayer. I ask that someone please pray for me, Portia Elizabeth Taylor please I need love I need love and all I ask is that you all will pray That Jesus, please help me please. I’m begging you please. I don’t wanna commit suicide because of the pain and the loneliness is the confusion and misunderstanding that I’m going through. But there’s days that I’m feeling so lost. I see that they don’t want my advice. I don’t understand why they don’t want to be a part of me in my life. If I ask them to go to the store for me, they take their time and get upset with me. I see their bodies crunching up.I see their faces, frowns up when I asked any of my Adult children to do something for me.
Walking through all types of weather getting my children back-and-forth to school where the fathers were never there my immediate family wasn’t there to my struggles, but I held my head up out of the water and I don’t know how I did it. All I can do now is look back at all of my struggles. Where God help me to organize for all appointments on time not worried about getting here and they had to reschedule. I can look back to see when I had to use public transportation with three children. Leaving the Food Market carrying six grocery bags on one arm, and the other arm seven bags. I remember getting on the city bus and people would look at me and my three young children ahead. Hoping to see that there was an empty seat for my bags and my children. I cry so many nights for understanding I was depressed, angry I was bitter and I was hurt through it all. Please note that my first born was born in Germany. When I join the U.S. Army from 1980-1983.
I was under so much pressure.After walking out on Faith for my mother. Leaving the ABUSE household, where I was treated different from my other siblings. My mother would always tell me you look like your dad and I can’t stand you. She would even say that I would not ever amount to nothing. My dad would always call me a dumb bell. I struggle so much in school. When I had to do assignments and school or take test.I will always hear my dad’s voice,You are a dumb bell. FAILED every time.I received nothing but D, F, C’s on my report cards. I had to go to summer school, in order to graduate with my class “1980”. I tried so hard to support my mother. Seeing my mother being physically and verbally abused. I myself was finger touch by my blood bother, victim for some of my UNCLES where they would come visit my parents, but all alone come to touch me inappropriate. My mother always asked me. Why do I run when my uncles will come. I couldn’t explain it to her as I was too young. I Join the military to help my mother. She had some many excuses why she couldn’t leave.Well through my whole military experience, I was sexually harassed, sexually proposition from the higher uppers. I was told that I would receive more rank on my collar if I did sleep with them/ him.Of course I refuse it all. But they had me suffer until I completed my whole six years. Serving my God through it all .I really didn’t have a relationship with God , during those confusing times and difficult times, but I can truly say I do now. I want God to know that I love him and his commandments. I thank God for conceited me out my mothers womb. He was the first to write a plan for my life. And ask for forgiveness for. leaning on my own understanding and not leaning on God’s understanding is where I am at today. I do have a relationship with God. I get up at 3:00AM or 4 AM to pray too my Heavenly Father. That I truly love.I try so hard to please all the people I love, but I see nothing but lies/ steel. I truly don’t trust any of my Adult children. I have been suffering from depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts. I can hear when I am instructed to do something but I don’t really know if it’s God so I’ll go and pray for clarity but still I don’t know.I just don’t understand. I have helped so many people including my sisters and brothers in Christ. I have been taken advantage in so many different ways. Please help because all I ever wanted too see everyone HAPPY. Helping my adult children and helping my sisters and brothers in Christ. It is medicine for me. When I see other people that are in need and I can help I feel good because now they are happy and I am happy that’s all I ever wanted. I am angry and confuse that my adult children had to approach be by emasculating me, showing, using me and then turn around and show nothing but fake love in betrayal, And I forgive everyone who have offended me and hurt me and I asked that you, Lord Jesus forgive me for hurting people, and I asked for mercy on my soul.In the name of Jesus. Amen.
Thank you Jesus for listening and answering my prayer. Happy birthday, Lord Jesus…..🙏

St. Jude the most holy apostle, faithful servant and friend of Jesus, the church honoureth and invoketh thee universally, as patron of hopeless cases, and of things most despaired of.
Pray for me, who am so miserable. Make use, I implore thee, of that particular privilege accorded to thee, to bring visible and speedy help where help was almost despaired of.
Reunite my ex-girlfriend, my true love, and I. I ask that you pray for us to come together again.
The love we have for one another is true. I ask that you help us to come together again, stronger and healthier then ever before, so we may get married and have a beautiful family, like we both want so much. And that I may be a better man and provide for her in every way! I cry everyday, and miss her with all my heart.
I praise God with thee and all the elect throughout eternity.I promise thee, O blessed Jude, to be ever mindful of this great favour, to always honour thee as my special and powerful patron, and to gratefully encourage devotion to thee.
Amen.

Dearest Lord, I call upon Your Name to praise and worship You for the countless favors You have done for us. You showered us with Your love and abounding grace. You fought battles for us and endured the pain with us. Lord, we ask for healing and forgiveness during this difficult time.

I pray for the restoration of my broken relationship with Ruben. I pray that we can recover from the deep wounds and the hurt we are going through. Father you know that what happened was unjust, yet I am still here trying to make this work. Allow us to learn to love each other without giving up. May our relationship flourish and become an inspiration for others.

May this experience remind us that our relationship is Your miraculous gift to our lives. I ask for forgiveness if I fell short of giving My best to nurture our relationship, dear Father. Forgive us as we were blinded by deep pains and fears. As we renew our relationship, be with us, Father, in this journey. Remove all the torment we both have in our heads. Let his heart feel peace when he is near me father. and remove all the warfare the enemy is raging in his head right now. Give him victory over the thoughts over his head. Send your holy spirit so that Ican pray for him in the way that he needs toheal and to be the wife you command me to be in this relationship.

This we pray,

Amen.

im in a tough spot with my mom right now. it seems like lately all we do is fight about everything. with it being so close to Christmas, my new years resolution is to squash any tenseness and fragility between us. i just recently lost my dad so she is all i got and i dont want it to be like this. i want to go back to being best friends. all this fighting has just made me shut down.