Praying for Strength

by Shamaine ()

Good morning and thank you for this opportunity to help people like me who don’t know how to pray for themselves. I am a 47 year old African American female. I have 3 grown children and 4 great grandchildren. I am married to my husband 23 years. I am about to graduate with an associate in criminal justice without any plans of if or what to do with it. I am working a job that I like but it’s pay check to pay check. I live in a two bedroom townhouse along with my husband, my two sons, one grand baby and a daughter in law. I am not complaining because nothing is like family being close but I know I need to plan my own life. My marriage feels shattered at times, my finances or in shambles and the majority of my life is and always been to wait for human directions instead of God. I do know I spend lots of time protecting and directing others and keeping myself last. I mostly hide my feelings behind drinking and taking pills to change my outside feelings but deep inside I’m crushed. It hurts a much and I know if I don’t save myself as long as I am saving the ones around me they will never stop to think or notice my pain without criticism and judgement. I pray strongly for my family and their future but I need to find my way and find what makes me happy. I want to leave those excuses alone and gather what I need to grow and build. I pray for forgiveness, for growth, prosperity, for goals to be built and reached. I pray to graduate and cross that stage on May 11, 2023 without a worry in the world but with the mentality of knowing that I am entering a new chapter, a new career, a new path, and a happy place with God by my side. I ant to be close to my family but on my own accords not theirs. I pray for my boys to go out there and find the best legal way for them and their family. I pray for my husband and our marriages that we can stop arguing time after time. In the end I ask God to make this journey and to reach my goals that he removes anyone or anything that will try to get in my way and hold me back. I pray for me. Amen

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