This is my grandbaby Kyra Kay I had to say goodbye to her today she’s leaving out of state I know she’s too young to remember me but we were very very close she was about the only thing that loved me we had so much fun together I’ve had a horrible couple of months I lost my car because it broke down I lost my home and all that was in it and I didn’t even know I would losing it due to my kid did not pay rent and I found out at the last moment lost family lost my only granddaughter that ever love me I’ve lost two of my dogs I’m homeless I’m disabled all the organization that I have referrals I have to wait for them to call me and they said it could take up to 30 days even longer to get back in touch ive done everything I’m supposed to do every time I get my hopes up too go to an appointment with an organization that might be able to help me it somehow gets screwed up it has been terrible i feels like there’s a horrible evil Omen on my back and won’t get off I pray and I pray and I pray i continue to ask for prayer requests a pray with people in person I do whatever I can do but I am starting to believe that maybe there is no God out there or if there is but he doesn’t want me in the picture I want to give up so badly and if I wasn’t scared to take my own life I would but I’m too scared plus it’s a sin.. I feel like I’m going to have a mental breakdown a complete mental breakdown it’s just hard to explain I only have a few more days before I’m going to be on the streets again and it’s scary out there especially since I’ve never been homeless in my entire life and I have no clue what I’m doing and I’m tired and I’m old and I just don’t know if I can do it again it’s just too hot I don’t know what else to do no matter what I do nothing works no matter what I say nobody cares and no matter how hard I try to pick myself up from the bottomless pit something keeps pushing me right back down I fear that its never going to end I hope that someone will read this and pray for me because I don’t know what else to do or even if prayer is working it doesn’t seem to be. I’m broke again because I’ve had to pay for a few nights in a motel because I just couldn’t take the heat anymore my dogs and i needed to have a place to stay and cool down rest and clean up homeless organizations won’t take me because I don’t have a drug problem and I’m disabled others will take me but they won’t let take my medical dog who is certified and trained to take care of me. I’ll be back on the street soon I’m scared alone have no family no friends no one I’m very worried about my mental/physical state because I’m not feeling well and I’m not thinking clearly anymore I just don’t know anymore and no matter what there’s no hope insite but thank you for listening I don’t think prayer will work but please pray for me or maybe somehow you can find out if God mad at me if so i don’t need to worry about praying anymore I don’t know that how confused and upset I am my stress is just too much to bear.
Thank you for reading
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