Overwhelmed and ashamed

by Lisa ()

I am the sole caregiver for my elderly parents. In short, I was in a car accident that was not my fault and the car is totaled and I just got that car. We live in a rural country town where a car is necessary. I am unemployed because my time is caring for my parents and I don’t have any family close by nor do I really have a solid relationship with any of my family. No true friends. Everyone just wants to take advantage. Say they are my friend and stab me in my back. I feel so alone and now can’t get to the store, pick up meds, take garbage to dump, etc., because I don’t have a vehicle and can’t afford another one. The insurance company just barley paid off the car that was in accident and thank God I had gap coverage because that will help pay for the rest. So I was not exactly made whole. I got chump change for my pain and suffering.` I am at my wits end because I don’t know how we are going to survive this and I honestly don’t know what to do. I don’t trust anyone, I have reached out to churches, charities and nothing. I appreciate the prayers but I need help now. I am praying and am really trying to believe God’s promise of Philippians 4:19. And I hate to sound doubtful but God tells me not to be afraid and to trust him and things just seem to keep on going from bad to worse. I know God’s timing is not my timing. I really pray that He help me to understand what it is He is trying to tell me. I have become so depressed that I am doing things I know I shouldn’t do such started drinking way too much. I don’t like this at all. You say, how is she able to drink if she can’t get anywhere? There is a senior citizen bus but I can’t depend on them for everything. They need more drivers and they don’t go everywhere. How did I get here? I need help and I need help to pray that there is someone out there who can help me with a decent, clean running car. Thank you for your prayers. God Bless!!

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