My entire life

by Jillian ()

I have been fighting for my kids seems like entirety now. Through the years and all my problems I have faced abuse unfair judgment the list goes on anything u can think of that could make your head spin and mind go haywire wondering how or why such things can continue to go wrong on to some one who doesn’t deserve it my kids were placed with there father who is very mentally and physically abusive there 13 and 9 and tell me he hits them and I feel sick to my stomach that my hands are tryed to help them at the moment and unfortunately the system does no justice at this time ethier it’s so unfair and seems almost unreal the way things are being done that one would actually believe there has to be more to the story that I was telling or things I’m not sayen but there isn’t and it’s part of what makes things so hard to keep fighting and holding on is a revolving door of failure let downs set backs and just fight fight fight but neva a way out and I have tryed everything to get them with me nothing has came about besides more depression anxiety worries struggle pain heartbreak I always get back up and continue my fight I’ll never give up on my kids or myself but it seems impossible these days I’m losen my strength my body is suffering I have major health problems now from my constant stress my mind is constantly running I feel like my heart and myself at times were just placed here to be someone’s therapeutic message I’m very spiritual yes I have questioned why to god and there are things I don’t understand I’m not perfect but I have a huge heart and I only live for my kids I need prayers for healing for strength to see hear speak all positive things I need the fight back in me I need to save my self and most of all my kids at times I feeel cursed I pray justice is given to me and my kids I pray all evil all chains Holding me down any bad intentions wishes doings will be broken and lifted from my entire being I need stability my kids with me I’m in a desperate call to Jesus and I pray alll the time but maybe the power of many praying together will bring me up and surround me with love and light I pray that Jesus will give me his sight his wisdom and guide me to get to his will for me I can’t take it anymore and I used to be a very strong woman so for me to start to lose hope faith trust and at times feel like if I can’t be that mother my kids need and make it happen then I don’t wana live anymore please if anyone reads this my name is Jillian my kids names are Jalysa Janeli Jaylene Lil Ryan ( manman) and Reese the two boys are the one’s being abused and the two I’m fighting there father and the courts to get back my three daughters are 23 18 and 17 in need of healing emotionally and physically I pray that my life will be made whole again that love happiness and unity becomes again and joy only my pain and suffering but my children’s as well will all end and we can be together I will be able to provide for them financially mentally emotionally and physically and alll negativity and any things that have or are standing in my way to make the things I ask possible be removed casted out made right and justice and love will be the only things surrounding me thanks for listening and I thank my father in heaven for given me the authority in his name to be able to claim this prayer I also thank anyone and everyone that will say a prayer for me and my kids I’m grateful and I pray all good things back at ya!! In the name of the father the son and the Holy Spirit I pray and covered in his blood Amen!!!!!

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