Man I loved has died, Lord.

by Mary ()

I am having a really hard time dealing with the death of a man that loved me so much and I kept him to the side. Now he has died and I can’t stand the pain of knowing he will never be around and will not be there for me. I took him for granted and his love.

Now it to late. I have prayed and begged God to let this be a bad dream or a mistake, but in my heart I know its real. I pray for a vision to get to talk to him in my dreams, something anything. This has been the most painful lession in my life. I have so many questions so many tears. I am so scared and actually sick from all of this. People try to comfort me, but they can’t. I have not let up crying for over a week. I need him back so badly. I cant stand to hear in time you will be ok. Its now that I am so full of hurt. I didnt know how much I loved him until it was to late. A family member told me he knew he and I didnt have a future together, but he was thankful I was his friend.

I didnt he thought we didnt have a future together. I need to know that he is ok and that he does love me and some day I will be with him again. I know this is wrong and God will get me for it. But its honest and its how I feel so no use hiding it from God. Please help me