I’m done with this thing called life

by Lakisha (Chicago Il)

Dear God,

Please dont be mad at me for what I am about to say but I have to be honest with you about my feelings lord and before I start off I want to say thank you for all of the things you have given me. But I think this thing called life is not meant for everybody because all of mylife Ive seen nothing but dark days and grin and bare it all of mylife and I will not be doing that anymore because it only makes me even feel worst. But I will not be living this life anymore yes I will breath until you take the breath out of my body but Im pretty much dead god and the only reason I dont take my own life is because I have two boys who is depending on me and I feel sad for them because they have been through so much in their lives and I wouldnt want to bring any more sadness to them and I will continue to give them all of the love and support I can give them lord but I will no longer fight for life because I feel its just a waste of time lord I have prayed and prayed only not to be answered and yes I am not the prefect person and not free of mistakes lord but I try each and every day to be the best person I can be to only be knocked out in every round a person gets tired after of while trying to keep fighting and to be only be let down again and again and the prayers I sent were simple ones bless my finances so I can properly take care of my family. Bless my small business which I have worked and invested all myself too because I believe in what I was doing, Bless my two boys so they could lead heathy lives, Stop my abusive ex-husband for harassing me making my life a living hell and the one person who I ever connected with on all levels who showed me what real unconditional love was to be knocked down there so what is the use of living if your life is only going to be full of sorrow and sadness I dont even know why I am here living but its your will not mine

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