Dear god, I’ve had a very long, heart breaking year, I’ve sinned a lot and I live in regret of the bad choices I’ve made. I want to be forgiven, I’ve been so lost, and it’s no excuse for the things I’ve done. I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore, I’m scared, I feel unworthy to be forgiven, unworthy to be loved, I’ve hurt so many people, including myself and I feel such deep remorse. I’m so tired of feeling uncertain, I’m tired of feeling weak and incapable. I’m tired of feeling empty, and when I do feel anything, I feel like a monster, heartless and cold. I can’t forget the past and move on, and I feel trapped, I just want to feel ok again, a little more like my old self so I can move forward and love again. I just want to feel you nearby like I used to lord. Those days were better and i want that again. I was happy, I was in love, and I was safe. Now I just feel alone and empty, and I’m begging lord, please, forgive me. I just want you to hear my only prayer and to give me something, peace of mind is all I ask for on these long dark nights.
by Sarah (Dayton)