I dont know if i have any hope left in my heart.

by Esi (Western-Cape)

Dear Lord,

I have ran out of words, i dont know how to ask anymore. I dont know if i have any hope left in my heart.

Lord, ive been waiting so many years now, and im not sure weather i should wait or give up Lord. i asked you 14yrs now for a soulmate but nothing happened.

Everytime i met someone they not interested or they just dissapear. It feels like You dont love me . When i look around everyone is so happy with their partners, when i open a book everyone has someone to love and when i switch on the tv everyone finds love. it makes me wanna shout why am i lonely .

all my family and friends are so happily involved, im left out. theres no one to hug me or say i care, no one that prays for me. im left on my own. when a friend or family member met someone they immediately fall inlove, but with me they never see me. when i met someone they disspear.

What have i done wrong? where have i gone wrong? where did love slip away me? i feel so forgotten so unapreciated, so lonely.

Maybe i have done something wrong wich im not aware of, if so forgive me for that. But i really want someone in my life, i grow older and all these years of emptyness and loneliness i feel exchausted and not loved.

I know im not worthy of your love and i dont deserve anything from. maybe im not pretty enought Lord ,but im greatfull to be me. i just wana feel loved, i wana go to the beach with that special someone, hug him look in eyes and share all the small things in life.

i miss this guy who i met valentinesday, i truely miss him, i wana share all my life with him, i have nothing but love to give. Take away this loneliness this eating pain , have mercy on me. Take away my pain please. Give me a chance in someone i likes life. please send him back to me and fill his heart with love for me.

Take away the thoughts of suicide as im geatefull for this life but when the pain comes i think of suicide. i remember him as if it was yestrday and i wat to be with him so bad. let he love me for me for who You created me to be in his life. im realy inlove with him so much.

i wish i can see him now, please give me a chance. please tell him about me and my feelings for him. let my soul rejoice in You. please forgive my sins , my family sins and bless me now.

in Your Mighty Name

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