by Rafa ()

I am a youth guy at church for about 10 years now. I married a young lady last October but its has been a train ride down for the most part. I am confused. As i would approach her to actually begin dating her at first i felt like i was entering extreme darkness. I was confused. I would pray and ask God for multiple signs and confirmations of His will to ensure that as always I was staying in His will. It has definitely been an extreme challenge full of confusion despair regret sadness destruction difficulty anger frustration as I gave myself to this young lady and proposed and married her despite the challenges. It was pure faith from my part. I would pray God would confirm then something would always try to stop me. I understand that because things are difficult it doesn’t mean it’s not Gods will but she left. I made a mistake in my past by being with another young lady physically and it has caught up to me. I asked God for forgiveness but this young lady doesn’t understand that this wasn’t something I did to her I didnt know the future, I still don’t. It was a bad choice in a time of tempting and now I am in a bind because my wife doesn’t think the same way. That this was before her time and that this has nothing to do with my love for her. She also dislikes my family because she is so convinced that my family shouldn’t speak to the young lady I made a mistake with. They don’t have anything to do with that and all of this was before her time. Well shortly after that she left and came back then we fought and struggled even more then she left again and hasn’t come back. She hates me and is embarrassed of me and considers me trash. Shortly after that I lost my jon5and shortly after that my business failed. Now I’m on the brink of losing my house and everything else including my wife. It has been a difficult experience and very challenging. I’m struggling. There’s still much more but I know I need help with prayer. I now don’t know if this wife of mine that apparently isn’t legally my wife because of a mixup at the court is really meant to be with me or not. I am really in love with her and it hurts for me to think of her gone and with some other guy. She’s young and immature and now I’m in a place I don’t want to be in but most importantly I don’t know what God really wants of me other than to be patient and that’s all He has said. Just need some help

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