You know I have always tried to live my life the way you want me to. You know I have a good heart and always put others before myself. You have blessed me with an amazing family that i would do anything for, and the most supportive and loving friends I could ever ask for and for all this I feel truly blessed and im grateful.
There was a turning point 4 years ago where i did something I know you were not proud of. I failed you. After a year of guilt and shame, I brought it before you and confessed my sin in my place of worship and I believe I was forgiven. Years later and I am almost in the same position. I am not proud of this way of life at all, but at the time, I felt like i had no other option but to do it – with everything that was happening around me.
Today lord, i feel like everything is going wrong around me and I can’t help but feel it is a punishment because of the life I’m living. I ask for your forgiveness as well as my strength in getting me through this. I’m crying as I write this as I honestly feel like because I’ve made this mistake again, i have cursed myself and my family. I don’t want them to suffer for any of my mistakes, but can’t help but feel they are. I am definitely reaping what i have sowen, but lord i honestly cant take it. Its too much. My wonderful parents have struggled so much to give me the life they wanted for me and if they ever knew about these sins, it would completely break their hearts.
Lord i ask for your forgivness and pray that you help me amend my wrongdoings. My heart is weak and my faith in you is the only thing thats helping me cope with this. Last week you sent me a warning, an intervention that has given me the opportunity to end this way of life. Please heavenly father help me to stop this now and to never turn back.
I also pray for anyone in my position to amend their wrongdoings with your help father. Help them so they may live a life of peace and have eternal life to look forward to in your precious name. Amen.