Coming Back

by Mark Adkins ()

I ask Lord for continued strength, as I try and break away from the shackles of anxiety and the need to be a people pleaser. My mom and dad say my biggest strength (caring for others and what they think/feel) is also my biggest weakness.

I’ve been a worrier since my youth … always concerned about others thoughts about me and trying to mold myself to make sure I fit in, was/am popular, etc. When confrontations occur over issues at work and so forth, I tend to be meek and try to conform to what a boss, co-worker, and sometimes even my wife/daughter say so that I don’t rock the boat any further.

I was fortunate to grow up in a Christian home and I take those same principles with me throughout my daily life as often a possible but for the last decade since we’ve moved many times due to my work, our family has gotten away from attending Sunday services, meditating on the word and praying as often as we should. I know this is no excuse as God is always there and only asks for so little for the rewards he gives. I’ve found a trusted friend at my current workplace who is a strong Christian … we’ve had some great conversations but to get back to where we used to be will be a long road.

I know I fall short of your grace daily and get ensared in bad decisions and sin often. Please God help me be strong and know that you are with me and want me to be a strong leader in faith for my family and the world.

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