Asking for prayers against addiction. Evil spirited people that keep running my faith into the ground every glimpse i get of hope. Understanding of what is going on. Power to have my faith in my UNSPECIFIED GENDER GOD not be taken from me anymore. For games to end. For my babies. I want them bavk and i want to be a better mom than i ever was before. For people to please stop pushing christanity and jesus on me especially since while methed out a few times i suddenly believed i WAS jesus and now throwing bibles at me left and right really freaks me out… I dont want anymore pain. Or people in my body. Its destroying me beyond imagination. I dont want people to keep knocking me down and everytime i get my head barely above water they continue to play games. I dont want these rancid thoughta intruding my head any longer. Or people deliberately making me feel as though im crazy. I dont want to lose my hope in humanity. Yet im rapidly losing hope in every aspect of life. I dont ever want any1 to have to feel suicidal.. Especially you kids. Nor do i want to feel suicidal again. I dont want these people steady preaching family and then keeping me in hell where they say i belong. I dont want to continue beating myself up NOR having other people continue jumping me day in day out. I want my faith restored in not only god. Not only myself. But PEOPLE. Cuz this world is looking uglier and uglier by the minute and i hate seeing it that way. I just want peace. I want myself surrounded by those who ACTUALLY CARE not those who just sit and play games with me ALL THE TIME. They acknowlege that im actually a caring person.. And then continue to beat it out of me.. These SAME people that want me to continue having high spirits and faith and say they want me… These same people that then turn around and want me dead.. I have a great heart and im so ao so sick of these people trampling all over it! I dont want to hurt anymore. I just want god to stop letting them hurtme evedy which way i turn.