A thanks for listening, and an ask for help.

Dear God,

I write you this thankful prayer to thank you for listening to me, and a request. And i am sorry if I have asked more than I have thanked.

When all this thing between me and him first started, i decided to change. I never confessed my sins to you, but i still promised you that i’d change. I have asked you to let him love me, so he did. I also have asked you to let him show me signs, and so you did. I thanked you so much. But yet, i remained covered in the sins of my past.
Then he found out about them, so he started acting weird and drew back from me. I thought that all the talk in my head that he likes me, was that’s it, only in my head. Thats the reason why i was mad, confused, and furious. I didn’t know if you listened to me in the first place, i didn’t know if i do anything wrong and i didn’t know what went wrong, or did i?i denied it. i started looking in all the possible reasons in the world, and my days continued to be worse, and i yet denied it. i started to make it worse by talking to him about guys.
Anyways, although i was mad and confused with you, that you possibly showed be those signs then took him away from me. But i still had faith in you, and i continued to pray for you to give me a reason, and for a second chance when i make it right. So i confessed my sins to you, hoping you’d forgive me, and not let those sins ruin the good that is coming for me, and that they vanish along with my guilt. Before yesterday when i spoke to him, i finally faced it and we talked about everything, he was very mean before and told my friend that he doesn’t wanna be close to me again for that certain reason. But after we talked, you opened up his heart. he was better. he told me he wants to open a new page. I cried tears of happiness when i noticed what you did. Making me feel what i did was wrong and it has its punishments. So you took something from me that you yourself gave me, to show me its worth. Then returned it once i confessed my sins. Hebrew 11:36, “For he have need patience, that after he have done the will of God, he might receive the promise.”
My faith towards you grew a lot this week. Even when it seemed like a he would never like me and its a dead end, i couldn’t believe that these signs weren’t from you, so i continued to pray and have more patience.
Thank you so much for making me notice my past mistakes and for hopefully giving me a second chance with him.

Dear God,
If its in your will of course more than if its in my will, that you please may give me this second chance with him, and thats its not in my head.
Please God, may you make this easier on me than last week, because i am very tired.
I have patience and faith in you of course, but i’m just tired. May you please make this easier on me and may you open up his heart even more and for him to think of me again the way he did and the way you made him do, and for you to bring us together to a healthy relationship, and let love unite us. Please god, may you please help me with this second chance by making it easier on me and opening his heart to me faster and by helping him totally forget what i did.

I love you so much