Desperate for Comfort

by Tamara ()

I am weary tired drained and exhausted. 2 yrs ago i lost my first born and only son at 22 from suicide. This was a shock beyond imagination The pandemic hit four months later and the world changed adding in another layer of struggles. This late spring my husband became sick with a rare brain infection and spent 95 days in the hospital and rehab. By Gods grace he has recovered enough to return to work but is a very different person. There is no intimacy on any level. I am his caregiver and room mate My brother who lives out of state and my mother who lives near are extreme narcissists and she is a hoarder. I struggle with providing money to her every month while she spends it on things to hoard and rather then clean her clothes she buys more. My brother does nothing. I had not been to her apt for several months ( she comes to our home for meals/ visit) i took her soup and found her living in a garbage dump i spent 5 1/2 hrs cleaning just her fridge that was full and rotting. I am exhausted. I have not allowed myself to grieve my son as I’m afraid i won’t come
Out of it. My in-laws deserted us long ago even though we put a lot of money iN their business that they have since walked away from and left us. I need that resolved We will never get a dime back, but i want out from under it ASAP. I take care of everyone and receive no love nor comfort nor support from any form of family. I have wonderful friends yet I only share so much so as not to burden them. I am exhausted. I see Gods grace in many ways but I need a break and some positive things to happen in my life. I need healing of my heart and mind and body. I need rest and comfort and to feel love and support. Thank you for your ministry and your prayers… I am grateful for both!

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